It's All Emily's Fault
by GoddessofNature09
Summary: After Emily's "death", Derek and Spencer's relationship gets complicated after a one-night stand. Things get even crazier when a blast from the past returns.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: We, sadly, don't own Criminal Minds at all. :( We do own our plot and OC Audrianna.

A/N: This is a collaboration with my friend Rowena Dawson over at LiveJournal. Also, updates will be relatively far apart. We are both in college and always some something to do. As soon as a chapter is ready, I will update :) Read & Review! Enjoy

Love,

GoddessofNature09 & Rowena Dawson

The light from the outside window streamed through a tiny crack in the blinds. Despite various attempts that had been made to fasten the blinds accurately, they had refused to shut correctly. Therefore, light streamed out from beneath the cracks liberally. The light was streaming across the sleeping form's face, which stirred restlessly.

The slender male frame stirred slightly, his messy chestnut hair, covering his face. After a couple of moments, the light finally was enough for the man to open his eyes. For a second of so, he just lay in bed, knocking the million mile-an-hour dreams and thoughts out of his head. There was something that kept coming back to him…the flash of lights, clinking glasses, laughter, a television set, dark skin on white…

His heart jolted at the memory and he sat straight up.

Did he…

The other side of the bed was ruffled, and still warm, revealing that it had been occupied not too long ago.

Spencer Reid swallowed hard. Last night hadn't been just an amazing dream, it had been real. Derek Morgan, _The_ Derek Morgan, had come over to his house last night. He had come over late, in a bad state of mind and the two had sat and watched television, something about sports, in an effort to calm him down. Granted, Spencer hadn't been the same since Emily had died, and the memory still hurt, but the visit was unexpected.

He had only meant to offer him a listening ear and maybe a couch if it had been too late for the man to travel, but when Derek had made the move, needing someone, there had been no hesitation on his part.

The clock read 8:23 a.m., he noticed, as he got up to shower.

Last night hadn't been a dream, but it may as well have been. Derek wasn't here now with him and hadn't even left a trace, as if he were never there in the first place.

Derek Morgan has been in this situation before, but God-damned. This was a new one for him. He's fucking sneaking out of Spencer Reid's place after a one night stand. What the hell was he thinking? Derek could feel scratches on his back and his neck felt like it was bitten more than once. Great. How the hell was he going to get out of this? The girls he hooked up with didn't work with him. He wasn't even gay!

"Fuck," Derek muttered for the umpteenth time that morning. He parked in his driveway, turned off the car and just sat there. He closed his eyes and let out a breath. He didn't go to Spencer's for that. All he remembered was watching the game, explaining football to Spencer and the next thing he knows he is kissed down Spencer's chest. Derek shook his head and got out of his truck. Maybe the whole thing would blow over. It was just lust mixed with all the feelings they were both feeling after Emily's death. Right?

"Fuck," he said again. He grabbed his duffel bag from the trunk and headed into his house. He walked into his two-story home and was greeted by his 8-year-old German shepherd, Clooney. "I'm so glad that I got you neutered. I don't have to worry about you thinking with the downstairs brain." Clooney simply barked and ran into the kitchen.

Derek headed to the shower. He let the hot water soothe and relax him. He let his head hang and let the water hit his head. Memories kept popping into his head. He remembered both of them moving to the bedroom, stripping as they went. He remembered pinning Spencer to the wall a couple of times. He remembered kissing those-

"Damn it!" Derek wouldn't let his mind go there. What the hell was he thinking? How did that even happen? Jesus. He quickly got out of the shower and tried figuring out what the hell he was going to do. He just needed a distraction. That was it. Simple. Only he did everything he had to do. Derek sighed and got dressed. He grabbed his phone and realized he had a miss call. "Don't be work. I can't handle that shit right now." He looked at the caller Id and noted it was one of his tenants. They had a leak. Derek took it as a sign from God and quickly left the house to get to work.

The project, which was way worse than poor Mrs. Harris let on, required a trip to Lowe's. Only when Derek got there, he was face to face with the last person he'd ever expect to run into.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

(A/N: Special Shout out to BuffyReid & InNer PerVert 'lowfat yogurt for their reviews!)

The rest of the day was torture. If not having to hear Derek repeat the "happy" news several more times, he had to watch him smiling and happy as if the best thing in the world had happened to him. He gave himself a moment to wonder if he had made Derek feel anything. He shook himself out of it and dug into his paperwork. It was a relief when the clock struck five. The team had barely started to pack up and he was out of these before anyone said anything.

When he was on his bike, he could finally let himself begin to feel. Showing any emotion at all in a room full of profilers was like opening a can of worms. The steady rhythm of peddling was therapeutic and it helped to relax him. He finally reached his apartment and walked his bike into the entryway, shutting the door behind him.

He had just removed his over-sized helmet when he was suddenly struck with an all too familiar migraine. Gasping at the pain and trying desperately to move, he groped at the kitchen counter for some pain medication. The counter had many useful bits and bobs, but not what he was looking for.

Crying from the pain, he walked, hunched, to his bedroom and pulled open a bedside table and slipped on the dark-shaded glasses that had been put there not so long ago. Next to it was a half-empty bottle of aspirin. It was the strongest thing that he could take besides migraine medication, but he tried his best to stay away from most medication stronger than aspirin. It never led to anything good.

He dry-swallowed three of them, knowing that it wouldn't make the pain away, it would only make it bearable. Now, however, the pain was too much for him as he felt the tears roll down his face and he curled into a fetal position on his bed. He blocked his face from the light, in hopes that maybe, just maybe, it would help the pain to go away faster.

He hadn't had the migraines for a long time, but he didn't doubt that they were back because of Derek and well, the stress. Why hadn't he just turned the man away that night? Why had he answered the man's advances? Why the fuck had Derek met up with some girl the same day he had left him?

Spencer groaned and held his head. This wasn't helping.

He curled in as tight as he could and relaxed himself in the best way he knew how, by reciting poetry in his head. A couple hundred lines of Shakespeare and Proust were always helpful in getting him to calm down.

As he was drifting into a dreamless sleep, he didn't hear his cell phone ringing from his jacket's inner pocket from the other room.

After being damn near threatened by Garcia, Derek had no choice but to take her to meet his girlfriend, Audrianna. Work was over on time and Reid was out in a flash, so was Garcia. Part of Derek thought that she had her things ready the moment Derek told her Audrianna was ok with the visit. The duo made their way to Derek's car and drove the 30 minute trip to Audrianna's house.

"Her place is closer to work than yours. Is that why you showed up early to work today?" Garcia smiled. Derek chuckled, "No. We haven't hit the sleepover stage yet."

"Oh," she pouted. "That's no fun."

"Why do you seem disappointed?"

"Well, I know your stories with your flings, but this is different. You are in a committed relationship. You are growing up."

Derek turned into the parking lot and parked, "You sound like my sisters and mom. Beware she has two dogs that love to give kisses."

"What kind?" Garcia followed him into the apartment and up the two flights of stairs.

"German Shepherd and a Chocolate Lab," He knocked on 2D. As soon as his fist hit the door, barking ensued.

"Oh my. They sound huge. They aren't bigger than Clooney are they?" Garcia wasn't too fond of big dogs. She had a bad experience when she was 10.

"Not by much. They are good dogs. Don't worry."

"Sit down. It's only Derek," Audrianna said and opened the door. "Hello," she smiled.

"Did you even check the peep-hole?" Derek kissed her softly.

Audrianna rolled her eyes, "Yes I did thank you very much." She turned to Garcia. "Hi. It's nice to meet you," she held out her hand.

Garcia shook it and returned the smile, "You too. I can now put a face to the source of his smile"

"You sound like his mother," she blushed. "Come on in," Audrianna stepped to the side to let them in. "Can I get you guys anything?"

"No thank you."

"I'm good baby," Derek got on his knees and played with the dogs.

"Please, make yourself at home," Audrianna sat with her. Garcia wasn't sure what to expect, but she knew Audrianna had to be a looker. She was a head shorter than Derek and had caramel skin. Her hair had very tight curls and her eyes were an enticing green. Needless to say, Derek and Audrianna would have some beautiful children.

"So what do you do?"

"Well I have two jobs. I'm part interior design, part dog trainer."

Garcia raised a brow, "Wait a minute. You went to Northwestern Law with Derek. How did you become an interior design/dog trainer?"

"When I went to Northwestern, I wanted to be a lawyer. I was dead set on it, but after I dropped out, I started picking up odd jobs. One of them was a dog trainer's assistant and I started dabbling in design as a hobby, but I made it my living."

"Sounds fun," she smiled. "So can I hear the story?"

Derek sat next to Audrianna and checked his watch, "That took a total of 15 minutes."

"Derek didn't tell you? Well I suppose not. He doesn't come off in a good light."

"Oooh. Now I'm really interested. Please do tell."

Audrianna cleared her throat, "Once upon a time, there was a girl. A quiet girl who was in college for her studies, not for stupid jocks. Sadly, one of the stupid jocks who shall remain nameless," she pointed at Derek. "Was in all of her classes, and would not leave her alone. He tried with all his might to get the girl to be his friend, but he failed. Until one day the girl needed help in math. He was passing and she was failing, so she asked for help. They became friends after that."  
>"The girl started flirting after that," Derek interjected.<p>

"I was getting to that. The girl and the stupid jock started talking and flirting more and more. After a while, the jock asked her out again and she said no because she didn't have time for the stupid jocks that were on the football team. The girl thought he was just like the rest, until homecoming came around. The girl's slutty girlfriend took me to the party and left me there. Some of the drunks decided to try and take advantage of the girl. The jock came to her rescue and after that night they started dating."

"Knight in shining armor from a young age, huh Derek," Garcia smiled at the two. She had to admit they were pretty damn cute together. "Why'd you two break up?"

"Sophomore year was hell for the both of us and life got in the way. We just drifted, but who knew Lowe's would be our meeting point again," Audrianna smiled.

"Are you coming to Henry's birthday party on Saturday?" Garcia asked. "The team would just love you."

"Yes I am. Derek said that if I don't come then expect them to come to me. I will be there and ready to be interrogated by a room of profilers…ok sorta ready."

Spencer's alarm buzzed angrily and with his head still under the covers, he hit it off. It was odd that the alarm was going off at all. Usually he was up and out before the 8 a.m. alarm would go off.

Blinking awake, he felt refreshed and strangely enough, he was feeling the best he had felt in weeks. He pulled himself out of bed and trudged to the bathroom. After he did the normal bathroom activities, he washed his face and dried it. Then, he looked at himself in the mirror.

He was feeling fine and even looked better than he had for a while. For the first time in a long time, he was ready for the time when he would see Derek and he c-

That's when he noticed the syringe in the sink. That was moments after he saw the needle mark, still fresh, in his arm.

Know he knew where his buzz was coming from. And he didn't feel so bad anymore.

It started as a chuckle and ended with him throwing back his head, and he laughed.

**Three Days Later:**

"Is Reid coming?"  
>It was the question on most of the profiler's minds at Henry's birthday party. Most of the team had arrived, sans the genius boy and Morgan. Rumors were circulating that Morgan was bringing his new girlfriend, an old flame from college, and of course, there was the story of Reid, who had been absent from work for the past three days.<p>

He had apparently called in the last three days as personal days and after a very quick interrogation from Hotch, apparently was approved for them. It wasn't as if he was always calling off, either. He hadn't used any free days in several years.

It still didn't make it any better though because no one had heard from him at all since he had called off. His phone had been off for most of the time and there was no sort of electronic communication either.

After a semi-worried text from J.J. about his well-being and asking if she should expect him at Henry's 3rd birthday party, he had finally replied back with a curt 'yes, I'll be there.' She didn't know if this response made her feel better or worse.

The profilers were anxious to see what would happen.

"Hey, Hey, Hey," The group heard Derek's voice come through the house.

"They're here. You guys are gonna love her," Garcia smiled and walked over.

"Hey Princess," Derek smiled and gave her a hug. "Sorry we're late, _someone _took forever."

"Yeah you. You're bald, what on Earth could you be doing in the bathroom for so long?" Audrianna shook her head. "Hi Penelope," she smiled.

"Hi Audri," she hugged her. After their first meeting, Garcia and Audrianna became quick friends and email buddies.

"Is everyone here?" Derek put Henry's present on the gift table.

"All except Reid. He said he's coming. It's kinda weird that he isn't here yet. He's the most punctual of all of us, not to mention he's the godfather."

Derek shrugged, "He probably got distracted." Derek never gave "that night" another thought. He wasn't gay. End of story. Besides, he is with Audrianna now.

"Everyone is in the backyard."

"Lead the way," Derek took Audrianna's hand and followed Garcia. "Hey guys, this is my girlfriend Audrianna. Babe, this is Aaron Hotchner, his 5-year-old Jack, Garcia's boyfriend Kevin Lynch, David Rossi, JJ, Will and the birthday boy Henry."

"It's nice to meet you," she smiled. "Derek has told me all about you guys."

"It's nice to meet you too," JJ smiled. "Thanks for coming."

"Are you kidding? I love kids. I have two nephews I don't see nearly enough."

"Come on. I'll show you around. We have a very make yourself a home philosophy here," JJ lead Audrianna into the house with Garcia following.

"Women interrogation is almost as predictable as conversations in the kitchen," David chuckled.

"She's been really nervous about meeting all of you," Derek put his hands in his pockets.

"Why?" Kevin asked from his spot in front of the chips.

"I'm assuming that majority of the people here are profilers and cops. I'd be nervous too," Will chimed in.

"It could be worse," David shrugged.

"How?" Derek looked at him.

"She could be meeting an Italian mother."

The girls walked out a few minutes later laughing. Audrianna walked back over to Derek.

"So what'd you talk about?" Derek asked her.

Audrianna smiled, "Nothing." She kissed his cheek and handed him a soda.

The party went on. Henry and Jack somehow got Kevin and Will into a game of hide and seek. Audrianna was getting along great with everyone, and after the very intense game of hide and seek, Dr. Spencer Reid finally made his appearance.

JJ was the first to see Reid as he arrived. For a second, she didn't even recognize him, but she had no idea why. It wasn't as if he looked odd. There was just something, well, different.

"Spen!" Henry cried and ran over to the man. Reid smiled and hugged him.

"Hey. Happy birthday Henry."

"Thank you!" And just as quick as he had latched himself unto Reid, Henry burst away again and started pestering Rossi. Henry was a ball of energy most days, but as excited as he was today, it was at least tripled.

Reid couldn't hold back a laugh as Henry nearly ran into a tree.

"Hey Spence."

JJ was walking towards him, holding a bowl full of pretzels.

"Hey."

"Haven't seen you in a while," she said. "How have you been?"

"I'm fine," Reid said with a shrug.

"I was just a little worried. It's unlike you not to call us fo-"

"I said I'm fine," Reid snapped. He felt the anger rise fast and strong.

"Alright then," JJ responded, trying to keep it light but Reid could tell by her face that she wasn't fooled at all. It looked like she was about to say something else, but she was interrupted by a large, loud and very Garcia laugh.

Reid looked over to see the BAU's favorite techie, but he didn't recognize the other man that was standing next to her. It looked as if they were pretty good friends by their body language.

He felt a ribbon of sweat on the back of his neck.

_You know what you could do to make yourself feel better?_

How long had it been since his last hit? How long would this party last until he could…

"Hey Pretty Boy."

And he turned to see Derek behind him, pouring a drink. He looked relatively happy and carefree. In other words, Reid was angry just by looking at him.

"Hi."

"Where have you been these past few days, man?"

_Like he cares…_

"Personal days."

"Yeah, I heard," the other man answered. "It was weird not seeing you empty the coffee machine every five minutes…"

_I'll hit you over the head with machine you stupid son of a-_

"Yeah," Reid said, cutting it short.

"Do you, uh, want something to drink, man?"

_A drink? That's the least thing I want you smug bastard._

"I'm not really thirsty."

"Okay, suit yourself."

_God, I feel like shit._

"Look, I should pr-"

"Derek!"

"You can't leave yet, you have to meet Audrianna!"

_Who the hell is she? Wait, is she…no, she couldn't be…_

The girl came walking over and immediately stuck out a hand. Reid waved at her instead. He never did like handshakes.

"You must be the famous Dr. Reid. Derek has told me everything about you…"

_Not everything apparently…._

"Oh. Thanks. And who are you again?"

Reid saw Derek's eyebrow twitch slightly. The girl looked a little flustered, but she continued.

"I'm Audrianna. Derek and I went to college together."

_It __**was**__ her! Shit! Damn it all to hell!_

Reid tried to keep himself from saying anything else because he wasn't sure anything that would come out would be appropriate at a three year olds birthday. He wondered if twiddling his thumbs would be rude.

"Who wants to play a game of t-ball?" Hotch called out, brandishing a small, plastic bat. Jack had another bat and was actively chasing Rossi with it. The poor man looked exhausted. At the mention of the word 't-ball,' Jack had stopped and had run over to Hotch. Rossi was panting heavily.

"I'm down!" Morgan called out and turned to his date. "Hey, do you mind if I play a game? Hotch might try and fire me if I don't keep Jack from _**completely**_ killing David…"

Audrianna laughed and waved him on.

Reid grabbed a can of soda, despite the fact he wasn't really thirsty because it was something to do and focused his attention on watching the woman that Derek had chosen.

So, this was the woman. This was the woman he had met up with the day after they had slept together. There was no way that he had told her about them. Why should he? He was acting as if nothing had happened between them. It would be perfectly normal to introduce two friends together, right?

Audrianna was trying to initiate a conversation with him and he was just trying not to blow up and say something that he shouldn't. he nodded noncommittally at her and gave one word answers to keep the conversation going. It was going on fine, but she wouldn't stop talking. She was just talking and talking and talking…

"So, you two know each other well?"

_Oh, she was just teasing him now._

"We know each other very well," Reid finally answered, looking right at her.

"Oh? That's fan-"

And he went in for the kill.

"Yeah, you and I have more in common than you think."

And with that, Reid turned around and left the party.


	3. Chapter 3

(A/N: Special Shoutouts to: ReidsSoulmate420, Snowbeardolphin, elphaba and fiyero, nannily, BuffyReid and everyone else who reviewed (if I forgot any), favorite the story and/or me! You guys are great! :D Enjoy the next chapter!)

The group was shocked by Reid's behavior. It seemed like he was spiraling, but the team couldn't figure it out. Surely, he didn't use his dilaudid again. He wouldn't. He couldn't. Audrianna couldn't help, but feel like Spencer's 'episode' was sort of her fault. Derek, of course, said it wasn't. He put it to stress and left it at that. She played the conversation over again in her head. She probably did talk too much, but she was nervous. Derek spoke high of everyone on his team. Especially "pretty boy."

_We have more in common than you think._

What the hell did that mean? Audrianna couldn't figure out why such a simple sentence, which normally wouldn't bug her, got so far under her skin. His tone was a bit catty and had a slight attitude. It reminded Audrianna of one of Derek's ex-girlfriends. Ok maybe she was definitely over thinking it.

"Earth to Audrianna," her friend bumped her. Audrianna left her head and took in her surroundings again. She was currently at her friend's night club filing in for one of the waitresses.  
>Take these drinks to table five."<p>

"Sure," she grabbed the tray and delivered the drinks. The rest of her shift went smoothly until around 1:30 a.m. Audrianna noticed a certain Doctor walk into the club. He didn't seem like right. He seemed a bit frantic and just generally off. Audrianna chalked it up to alcohol. She just thought he drank too much. She decided to keep an eye on him and when Derek picked her up after he shift, they'd take him home. Audrianna got back to work.

Reid could barely taste the drink that he was nursing at the bar. He had woken up on the floor of his bathroom, not the first time but it had been a very long time since it had happened, and he had momentarily forgotten where he was. After a moment of utter confusion and panic, he ended up hitting his hand against the bathroom mirror. Looking at himself in the mirror, he had had a brief moment of clarity, where he found himself wondering, how the hell did he get here?

He took a swallow, the liquor burning down his throat. It was hardly a substitute for the dilaudid, but it was something. In the corner of his eye, he saw a man in a dark green coat adjust his cell phone once, twice and then rubbed the back of his neck. Reid made direct eye contact for a couple seconds and then looked away. About a minute later, the man disappeared into the bathroom.

Finishing his drink, he left the money for the drink on the bar and followed the man into the male restroom. He opened the door and found the man, leaning against a wall, checking his phone.

"I heard you got it."

"Maybe I do. I think you dropped this on your way in." The man pulled a clear vial out of a pocket. In response, Reid pulled out some money from his pocket and handed it over.

"Ah, it seems it was yours," the man answered, smiling and tucking the bills away and passing over the vial. "It's your lucky day."

"Yeah, it seems so."

As soon as the dealer left, Reid started to prepare the syringe. He fished a rubber band out of his bag and slipped it around his arm. He started filling the needle from the bottle. The syringe was full and he had just placed the needle to his arm when he noticed he wasn't alone.

He spun around and wasn't entirely prepared for who he saw.

"Oh, it's you."

"Are y-" Audrianna's eyes fell to the needle currently resting on his forearm. "What the hell are you doing?"

"What the fuck does it look like I'm doing?"

"Well, I know what it looks like," Audrianna answered, "But somehow I'm hoping that you aren't being that fucking stupid."

Reid blinked. A moment passed and she was still staring at him.

"Well?"

"Well, what?" Reid fired back. When she said nothing right away, he plunged the needle into his arm. Immediately, the tingling, warming sensation began to fill his body. He slumped back against the wall and closed his eyes.

Shocked and slightly disturbed, Audrianna said nothing right away. She was both angry and disgusted at the same time. Finally, she found her voice.

"Jesus!" Audrianna yelled. "Not in my bar you don't!"

Reid wasn't prepared for the girl to run over and grab his shirt, pulling him up to his feet. Instead of being able to balance himself, he flopped forward, landing face first unto the floor. It would have been comical if she weren't worried she had really hurt him.

"What the fuck…" Reid said, mumbling into the floor. He slowly pulled himself up and to a sitting position. "Are you trying to kill me?"

"You're trying to kill yourself with that shit," Audrianna answered, almost spitting at him.

"Yeah, well, you'd like that wouldn't you?" Reid said, pulling himself to standing.

"What?"

"Oh don't play dumb," he snarled, catching his weight on a bathroom sink. "You'd love to have me gone." He felt a fire within him flare up before smoldering again in his chest.

"What?"

"You heard me."

"You're acting crazy, Spencer. Derek wouldn't w-"

"How would you know what he wants?" he yelled out, catching her off guard. "You've been out of his life for years!"

"Well, I don't s-"

"No, you wouldn't know anything about him now."

By this point, Audrianna had had enough.

"Look here, asshole, I don't know who the hell you think you are, but you don't know anything about me," she yelled, walking forward and stepping up to his face. "I don't know what problem you have or what you are trying to prove, but I can tell you that I'm not going to take your shit. And I know more about him than you, even if you've been around him for longer, maybe there's a reason for that."

She was unprepared for the hand that came and smacked her across the face. The blow didn't knock her down, but her hands flew to her face in shock. Tears started to stream down her face from the force.

Immediately, Reid stopped what he was doing, looking shocked. He held out his hand, which was bright red. Without another thought, he ran out, wobbling slightly from the drugs.

Audrianna let him run out. Normally, she would have put up a fight. Hell, she's been smacked by a guy before, but this was different. The mark didn't hurt much, mostly it just stung. She brushed her curly hair back and examined her right cheek. _Great. _Spencer maybe small, but his drug-induced self, left a nice red mark on her face. Derek was going to notice. Audrianna looked at her watch and cursed. Her friend probably just called last call and Derek should be here at anymore. Just at that moment her phone vibrated. She pulled the phone out of her back pocket and looked at the text message she got.

_Hey babe, I'm at the bar. Where are you? Stacy says she hasn't seen you for 10 minutes. _

Audrianna chose not to answer. She pulled her hair to try and cover the mark as much as possible, and headed out of the bathroom. The club was pretty much empty at this point. Derek's back was towards her. Audrianna drapped her arms over his shoulders and kissed his jaw gently. "Here I am."

Derek slowly turned around and looked at her. He automatically noticed her face, "What the hell happened to your face?" He got up and examined her cheek. "Who hit you?"

_Fuck. _She didn't figure out what to tell Derek. She'd wait until they got to his place. She thought of a quick lie. "I was heading to the bathroom and two guys were fighting. Stupid me tried breaking it up and got slapped. I'm fine."

"Who was fighting?" Stacy joined the conversation.

"I don't know. I couldn't see faces," she looked at them. Stacy was worried and Derek looked like he was dealing with conflicting emotions. Audrianna sighed and put her forehead to his, "Just take me home, Derek."

Derek wrapped his arms securely around her waist and pulled her closer, "Did something else happen?"

"Don't you go profiling me, Derek Morgan." She smiled softly. "Take me home."

He nodded and kissed her softly, "Whatever you want."

"Let me just grab my bag," She pulled away and went behind the bar. "I'll call you later, Stacy." She hugged her friend.

"You better," She hugged her back. "You still haven't given me juicy details."

Audrianna laughed, "I just don't give those out. Bye." She grabbed her bag and walked out with Derek, hand-in-hand.

It was now 7 a.m. on Sunday morning. Audrianna couldn't sleep. Granted she was exhausted and Derek certainly did his part in making her even more tired when they came home, but she couldn't sleep. Her brain just wouldn't shut down. She curled to Derek and placed her head on his bare chest. She listened to his heartbeat. She blocked out everything, but that sound. She was drifting to sleep, but her mind wasn't having it. Thoughts of Spencer popped right back in her head.

"That's it," she sat up. "Derek wake up." She looked down at him. No movement. This was gonna take some work. She shook him. Nothing. "Baby wake up." She kissed him softly. Derek's hand came up and pulled her closer. That bastard was faking it. Audrianna wanted to be mad at him, but his kisses had the power to make her forget everything, but his lips on hers. His body on hers. Before she knew what was happening, she was flipped on her back and Derek was kissing down her neck.

"I love you in my shirt."

"You love me out of it too," she pulled his face back to her. He leaned for a kiss, but was blocked by her fingers on his lips. "No. I have to talk to you."

He kissed her fingers lightly, "Ok. What is it baby?" He shifted majority of his weight was on his arms, but he still hovered over her.

"Do you love me?" She asked simply.

"You know I do."

"Say it."

"I love you Audrianna. What's this about?" He looked at her.

"I need to ask you something and I need your honest answer. Don't beat around the bush or anything. I won't judge or but, I just need to know. I'm not accusing you."

"What is it?" Derek was getting worried. Did Audri think he was cheating on her or something?

Audrianna took a breath and a moment to find her words, "Did you and Spencer have a relationship?"

Derek was floored. Of all the things he thought she'd ask that was not one of them. Memories of Derek pushing Spencer against the wall and Spencer being more talented with his mouth than Derek thought imaginable came back to his memory. He tried so hard to suppress them, and he did a pretty damn good job of it. How did she-. It took Derek a minute to find his voice, but the minute was too long. Audrianna already had her answer. She was pushing Derek from on top of her and putting on her jeans.

"What are you doing?" He watched her.

"I need some air. I'm gonna take Clooney for a walk."

"I didn't answer you," he sat up.

Audrianna paused and looked at him, "Silence speaks volumes, Derek. Obviously something happened between you two or you would have said something." She continued to get dressed.

"I'm not gay."

"Oh so what are you? Gay when available? Gay for one person? Bi-Sexual? Please Derek tell me because right now, I'm feeling used."

"Baby, no. It wasn't like that," he got out of bed and moved to her. She had tears forming, and Derek automatically hated himself. "I would never do that to you."

"It doesn't seem like it. You could have told me. You knew I was going crazy trying to figure out why the hell he hated my guts and you knew all along."

"It was a one night stand! How the hell was I going to know he was going to get attached?" Derek snapped.

"Oh please Derek. Don't play the victim card, it doesn't suit you."

Derek gently grabbed her hand and pulled her to him, "Baby please. It was nothing." He combed her hair out of her face. "Just get back into bed."

"Now you are lying to yourself. I love you, Derek. I've loved you since the beginning and I know you love me, but it is possible to love more than one person," She said softly. "I'm willing to let you go if you want to be happy with him." Tears finally spilled.

"I don't love him." He shook his head. "Don't leave me," He whispered.

"I-I have to go Derek and you need to sort yourself and these feelings out. Spencer's at a breaking point right now. You might be the one to help him."

"What do you mean?"

Audrianna shook her head. "It isn't my place, but all I can say is he needs help. You might too."

"Baby just let me explain that-"

"Not now. I can't. I need to go home," she started pulling away.

"Are you breaking up with me?" Derek watched her move away from him.

"Don't make me say it," She shook her head.

Derek nodded. She made up her mind, "I love you."

"I love you too, Audrianna." Derek watched her leave and listened to her movement downstairs. He listened to the door shut and closed his eyes. He let her walk out the door a second time and she might not come back again. She thinks he'd be better off or happier with Spencer. Could he be? "What the hell am I going to do?" Out of frustration, Derek did the only thing he could do. He punched a hole into the wall and broke down.


	4. Chapter 4

(A/N: Sorry for the SUPER late update! Really we are! Special thanks for all of those who reviewed, favored our story and favored us. Rowena is now on , so go check her out! One last chapter!)

Derek decided that he was going to talk to Spencer. He had to. Audrianna already walked out on him, so what else could he lose? Derek was in his car driving to Spencer's, but instead of making the turn to go to Spencer's apartment, he kept straight and ended up at Garcia's. He didn't mean for it to happen. Maybe his subconscious wanted him to go over there first. Either way, he was there and up he went.

It took a few minutes of knowing before the door finally opened. Garcia wasn't in the happiest of moods being woken up at an ungodly hour by something other than work. She was preparing to rip the offender a new one, but when she saw he chocolate Adonis' distressed face she just brought him inside.

"Are you ok?" She looked at him.

"No, I'm not. I need to talk to you, but I need you to listen to the whole story first," Derek sighed and looked at her. Now Garcia was even more concerned and was already making her mental list of questions, but she made an agreement.

"Ok, start from the beginning," she sat down with Derek on the couch.

Derek took a moment to get his words together. The situation was bad enough. He didn't need bad word choice getting in the way. He finally let out the breath he didn't know he was holding and started telling the story. "It started a few days after Emily died. I was just not in the mood to be alone, so I went to Reid's."

_Definitely not what I saw coming._ Garcia thought.

Derek continued, "We had a couple drinks and watched some TV. I turned to say something to him and the next thing I know we're kissing." Garcia's eyes widened. "I didn't push him away. I just kept going."

"Now when you say you went for it, you mean-"

"We had sex."

"Do I get details?"

Derek gave her a look, "Really?"

"Sorry, I just sorry. Continue."

"When I came to, I realized the situation and I left." This earned Derek a smack on his arm. "I know, but I didn't think he'd want me hanging out. He's made it pretty obvious that he has feelings for me."

"Does Audrianna know?"

Derek sighed and rubbed his face, "Yeah, she knows."

"And?"

"She left me. At least until I figure this out."

Garcia sat back, "How are you dealing?" She couldn't think of anything else to say. This was the last thing she saw coming.

"Baby, I'm a mess. She thinks I have feelings for him," Derek rubbed the back of his neck.

She looked at him. She didn't have to be a profiler to see Derek was a definite mess of confliction. "Do you?" She asked softly.

"I care about the kid, but enough to be with him and break all the rules? I don't know. I really don't."

"Have you spoken to Spencer?"

"No," he said simply.

"Well that's how you figure it out. Talk to Spencer, like now."

"But-"

"No. This whole situation is because two of the world's best profilers are so ignorant about human behavior. Spencer is Spencer and you are Derek. You two need to talk before anything else happens. When it is a decent hour, I will call Audrianna and check on her. You talk to Spencer or so help me."

Derek sighed, "Thanks baby girl." He got up, kissed her cheek and left to Reid's. It was about 9 am when he got there. It was about 9:30 when he had the balls to get out the car. It was about 9:45 when Derek finally knocked on the front door.

Reid didn't hear the knocking at first. He was lying on his living room couch watching the discovery channel and wondering what he was going to do. It had been a day since he last shot up and he was starting to get the shakes and was almost in a full sweat.

He heard knocking at his front door.

For a second, he wondered if it was Monday and that he should be at work. When he realized it wasn't, and it was going on 10 in the morning, he was a little pissed. What if he had been sleeping? But who was he kidding, he hadn't fallen asleep for more than 20 minutes over the last couple days.

The knocking became more persistent. Sighing, he got up and opened the door to see the last person he expected or wanted to see, Derek Morgan.

Spencer blinked.

There was a moment of silence between them that was louder than if the two had started yelling at one another.

"Hi." Derek said finally, shifting his weight and feeling as if he were back in high school again.

"What are you doing here?" It was angry, but there was no force behind Spencer's words. He was too tired and worn out.

"I think we need to talk."

Spencer shrugged. It was impossible for him to make eye contact.

"I guess. You want to come in?"

Derek nodded and Spencer pushed open the door and walked into his apartment. He knew it was filthy and that Derek was walking in slowly behind him, surveying the room and trying to draw his conclusions about him, like profilers did.

"Would you like something to drink?"

"No, I'm okay."

Spencer poured himself a glass of water and joined the man in the living area. He raised an eyebrow when he saw Derek messing around with some of his things on the nearby coffee table. He felt a surge of anger, like a teenage child who caught a parent snooping in their things.

"Find anything incriminating?" he asked and Derek jumped slightly.

"Uh, sorry, I was…"

"Trying to profile me? It's rather obvious, Derek."

The use of the other man's first name caused a flicker of emotion to pass on the other man's face. Spencer noticed as it passed the other man's face briefly before it returned to the solid, stoic Derek Morgan that everyone knew.

"I didn't mean-"

"It's fine," he answered, shrugging. "So, what's up?"

Derek was shifting slightly on his feet, but didn't look anxious, but maybe a little angry. Spencer steadied himself for the conversation that the two had been dreading for a while. "I'm not used to not knowing what to say, so I'm just gonna talk. We had a one night stand, and I shouldn't have left. At least not like that. I knew that there were feelings, more than just the grief and obvious lust we were feeling, and I'm sorry. You didn't deserve that, and I never meant to cause anything that would ever hurt you pretty boy."

"Don't call me that," Spencer put his hands in his pocket.

Derek sighed, "Sorry. I shouldn't have ignored you like I did and simply put it behind me. I didn't realize how bad you were getting until Audrianna pointed it out to me," Derek sighed. "Not saying that you were feeling out of sorts just because of me."

Spencer shifted uncomfortably at her name. Granted he was getting high that night, but he remembered what he did. "Audrianna? S-she pointed it out?"

"Yeah," Derek nodded. "She broke up with me because of the situation we were in."

"So she told you about the night at the club?"

"Night at the club?" Derek raised an eyebrow.

_Fuck._


End file.
